Relationships Today: an endangered species too?
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| Photo: kaboompics.com |
I have it all. Work, health, wonderful friends, a loving and problem-free family. I travel a lot and pamper myself to any extravagant treatment in the city. I am just missing one thing: love. And I am not talking about the fraternal love for my sweet brother or the unconditional love for my mother. Or the loyal one of my friends. No. I mean a partner. Someone I can share stuff with. Someone who can share stuff with me. Take care of each other. Be there. And although I want it bad...I think I am converting myself to a "non believer". I don't believe in relationships any more. I have lost my faith. And it bums me.
Believe me - as any 30-something girl, I have tried. I had my rounds of blind dates, not-so-blind-dates, parties, events, gatherings, etc. that allowed me to meet a variety of men. (Not that I dated all of those I met...but some).
The pattern repeats itself. Either I am not interested. Or he is not interested (which is ok if I am not interested at the same time!) And while not finding Mr. Right is a little bit frustrating, what concerns me the most is the literal shallowness relationships have come to represent. Mostly a game.
Are RELATIONSHIPS the new "endangered species" of the XXIst Century?
Many married friends of mine are splitting up. (having been married for a few years only)Many co-workers are not only cheating on their partners (let's face it - long office hours or even business trips tend to create the perfect setting to spice up any not-so-happily-married-dude's life) but they keep it up like a sport. How many celebs are we hearing today that after a millionaire wedding - 4 months later "irreconcilable differences" come to the picture - and thus the "D" word as well?Are marriage certificates (or ex husbands/wives) collectible items now? The more you have the better? For someone who is still looking for one - knowing these trends is not necessarily motivating.
It seems that the pattern is the more superficial the relationship the better.
"Serial monogamy" is the new trend in Europe. (being faithful to your partner as long as you decide to continue together - which might be 2 days or 1 week and then move on to the next partner)Has the XXIst Century -email, internet, blogs like this one, SMS and other new techy ways of communication- made us all so cold and detached from experiencing feelings and emotions and connections? Are people afraid of really getting to know the other person? Really committing to someone they choose to be with?
I am not talking about a lifetime commitment (hell no! - we know that the "until death do us part" was in style 2 centuries ago when life expectancy was only 25 to 30 years). I am just talking to dedicate oneself to love and respect your partner as you do yourself as much time as you possibly can. Sorting out the good and bad. And really - I mean REALLY - trying your best. The minute this premise is not valid - then I agree with opting out (only when all solutions have been tried. But please, in the meantime - NO cheating! It is the ugliest, most damaging thing you can do to someone YOU CHOSE to love). Nothing can be as low as cheating. Nobody is holding anybody hostage. So why lie?
Relationships today (most of them) are shallow, have a short shelf-life, and are on the lows in Wall Street. Nobody wants to buy its stock. Its plunging. No IPO will help for now. We are the stakeholders - and we owe it to ourselves to be the best we can be.
I have made my share of mistakes - but they all made me who I am today. With my goods and my not-so-goods.. And while I strive to become a better person....I cannot stop from thinking: will relationships be outdated soon?
xoxo
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